Invitation Wording, Etiquette + Tips

Sandy here, ready to share some wedding invitation wording, etiquette, +  fun facts! Though my designs lean towards the modern, I believe that some things in weddings are sacred, and much of that applies to your wedding paper. So here's some paper wisdom, free of charge!


These days, couples are very creative with their wording. It sets the tone for what kind of celebration is in store for guests, and I love offering up ideas for my clients. One of the best ways to do this is through your RSVP card. Though “regrets” and “declines” are the classic go-to words, there are TONS of alternatives. However, the biggest mistake people make is with the actual invite, using the line "the honor of your presence”. This should only be used if your wedding takes place at a house of worship (church, synagogue, etc.) If you’re having it anywhere else and want to keep it traditional, go with “the pleasure of your company”.

FUN FACT: Did you know “RSVP” is an abbreviation of the French "repondez s'il vous plait", meaning "please respond”?

Titles for invitations + escort cards can trip up lots of people. The fact most surprising to my clients? “Miss” is for girls under 18, and “Master” is for boys under 13. Titles are used in most weddings, even casual ones.


Before the postal service, all invitations were hand-delivered. A courier would bring it to the butler of the home, who would then discard the outer envelope (most likely dirty from weather or finger prints) and hand the inner envelope to the recipient. Some couples still go for the inner + outer envelope, popular for a traditional or lavish affair!

Ever wonder why some invitations come with that piece of tissue? Back in the day, ink on the invitations would take a while to dry, so they’d place a piece of tissue between each card to prevent smudges and runs.

Married Name + Monograms

It’s considered bad luck to use your monogram before the wedding. So when designing a custom wedding logo, I often just go with the bride + groom’s first initials. For some, I’ll redesign the same logo to implement the monogram into their day-of paper (e.g. menus, escort cards).

 Photo:  Brooke Allison Photo  / Calligraphy (right):  Whoa Nellie  

Photo: Brooke Allison Photo / Calligraphy (right): Whoa Nellie 

Ultimately it’s up to each couple which traditions they implement, but there is one thing everyone should know….


STATIONERY =  invitations + writing paper

STATIONARY = not moving


Wishing you all fabulous paper adventures!

XO, Sandy